Saturday 19 March 2011

The Power of A Compliment


When I presented you my blog I said that we can change our lives by following simple practical rules of living. Yes we can do that. Today I will unfold one of the most infallible rules of living which will give you not only success in your personal relations but also will boost your popularity. It gives others a sincere fragrance of happiness and creates your long lasting impression.

It was around some five months ago in a market somebody waved me and when I stopped to see the gesticulation, the young man   ran towards me.  “Hi Sir! How are you! Remember me I am Sanjay  Gurang ,Chef at China Town! I was expecting to see you more at China Town. You liked the soup I prepared, remember!” He was bubbling with enthusiasm. I still remember that one fine evening I went to this restaurant to have soup. The soup was a bit costly but it was damn tasty. I went to the reception to make the payment instead of giving the cash to the attending waiter. I paid the bill and said to the manager that his chef was doing an amazing job. The manager felt elated and called the chef who was a frail looking Nepalese young man. The manger told him that I liked his work. I still remember the light of happiness and a light film of tears in his eyes. He was Sanjay Gurang who met me in the market. I went but remained in the memory of this man forever. Whenever I go to China Town he comes out to see me and last month he got a raise also!!!

Similarly a small stall owner who sells T-Shirts in Dadar (Mumbai) surprised me saying that he knows me. He said that he was, around some five years ago working as a security guard and I met him once saying that he was one of the fittest security guard I ever met. I never met this man after that, who even remembered my name as before entering that building premises I signed the visitors register. Actually I had signed on this man’s mind who never forgot me.

In Mumbai you can easily get tea on road side stalls what are called Cutting Tea Stalls. I love having that small cup once in a while and if the tea is good, I never lose a chance to complement the man who made it. The reward is the happiness you see on the face of that man.  That is worth the cost of hundred cups he sells!!!

Once I was getting my cell phone serviced at a shop and complemented the owner that he had kept his workshop in a very organized manner to beat the standards of ISO 9000 even. I saw that different spares, different accessories, everything was neatly kept in that shop in a very organized manner. He said that he was first time complimented in many years. He became more than happy. Even ignoring a strong insistence he refused to take his service charge and accepted only the cost of the spares!!! He installed the spares in my cell and I installed my lasting memory in his heart.

There is a power and huge power in a sincere praise, compliment and an appreciation. I repeat it should be a sincere compliment.  So let’s see what we have to do:-
ü  We all love to receive compliments and so do others. So compliment as frequently as you can.
ü  Don’t give a fake appreciation. This will put you in trouble. Make sure your compliment should be authentic.
ü  Compliment your mother, wife or your sister who prepares your daily meals selflessly. They deserve the compliment and the happiness it bestows.
ü  Praise your staff now and then that they are doing a good job. Believe me you will win their loyalty forever.
ü  Occasionally praise your wife/husband that she/he is looking good in so and so dress. Find things to compliment in your spouse and you will earn a life time guarantee that your relationship will bloom forever.
ü  Be liberal in your praise where your friends are concerned. Compliment them on their new dress, on some achievement of theirs however small. Compliment your girl or boy friend on looks to keep the fire of passion burning.
ü  Never lose a chance to compliment your female friends. A woman loves to be complimented on her beauty, dress and accessories. She will love you for your compliments.
ü  Compliment children on their studies, sports or any trait which is budding. You might water a seedling to grow into a huge tree.
ü  In case you are a manager and people are reporting to you then always praise and compliment your subordinates on their dispensed duties and whenever they strive to do good work. This will create a loyal army of yours and your team performance will improve. There would be less or no resignations in your team. Even Dr. Spencer Johnson in his management classic One Minute Manager focused on one minute appreciation.
ü  Last but not the least praise, compliment your parents on their achievements and what all they did for you. They already love you but will love even more on this.

So my dear friends you have this immense tool handy with you at zero cost. Don’t wait, go ahead!! Give somebody a sincere compliment. Do post me your own stories of success and suggest more ways of sincerely complimenting people, who after all are human beings craving for love, care and appreciation.

Waiting for your valuable comments and suggestions

With Love
Anurag


Tuesday 15 March 2011

End The Problem Worrying You Forever


 A report produced by WHO says that today in the modern society more people are dying due to worry and the problems caused by worry as compared to cancers and AIDS combined. I have a very serious concern where worry comes into picture. I really don’t want you to be in these hellish fires and maddening circles of worry. I too learned to crush worry by a hard way. It happened that after college fears and worries started creeping into my mind. I was worried about one and everything. I felt that I will fail for sure as I was worried about which career to choose. I was worried that I will end up very poor thus fear of poverty too occupied my mind. My heart use to beat like drums. Unfortunately like an average Indian boy, I was brought up in a very struggling environment so it was natural for me remain worried and tensed. However I knew that worry was killing me and I should do something about it. But the question was what to do and how to do? I learnt one thing about myself that what I worry about is actually is a conscious thought about some problem haunting me!!! I learnt that this slab of worry is made of bricks of problems and these bricks can be encountered one by one. I learnt a method to analyze and solve the problems for once and for all. I give my whole hearted credit and thanks to Dale Carnegie whose writings taught me this. Let’s see what it is. You need to analyze your worry problems in four steps.
ü  Figure out What is The Problem:  Pull out a pen and a paper and start writing about the problem which is worrying you. Write in full detail describing the nature and details of the problem. When you write you perform much better as compared to worrying. This will give you a clear picture about the invisible horror haunting you. Now you will come to know that who your ‘enemy ‘is and you know that knowledge is power.
ü  Figure out What are The Possible Solutions:  After going thru the first step you will feel at bit at ease and will be able to figure out the possible solutions of your problem. Write down all the possible solutions. You might ask me- Anurag, how will I know what are the solutions?? Then my answer will be then who will know if not you? Believe me every problem has hidden seeds of its own destruction and the best part is when you try finding them you will get them. So write down all the possible solutions which can end the problem.
ü  Figure out What is The Best Solution: Now you have accumulated all the potent missiles to destroy your problem after successfully completing step two. Here in this step you have to seriously analyze that which solution best suites your problem. Select that solution and fix it well in your mind. Write down the steps  which makes that solution. Now you are fully armed with your own built and with your own designed missile to attack the enemy to destroy it for once and for all. Let’s see what the final step is?
ü  Decide When Will You Start Acting On Your Best Solution: Action is ultimate panacea for all the ailments. Here you have to decide that by when you will start acting on your best solution. My suggestion would be to start acting immediately!!!! Don’t wait!!! Stand up!! Load your missile and fire!!!

These four steps will lead you to much a happy and relaxed state of mind as your problem which seemed so big before analyzing it will perish to ashes in front of you. And you would be glad that it was YOU YOURSELF who ended the problem. It will boost your self esteem and catalyze your self-confidence. Learning to handle your problems and ending them will be like acquiring a big weapon against FAILURE.
Dear reader I expect your valuable comments on this post of mine. Don’t forget posting them!

With Love,

Anurag



Sunday 13 March 2011

You Can Change Your Life

Dear Reader,

I bet and guarantee that you can change your life by following simple practical rules of living. Whatever you want to do, whatever is your dream, whatever maybe your aspirations; believe me you can achieve that. In my next post I will let you know what you have to do and what these simple rules are. Do post me your queries and dreams.

with love

Anurag